Face your fears

As long as I can remember, I’ve been afraid of spiders. All spiders. I’m somewhat ashamed to admit calling the fire department to help me rid my bathroom of a spider nest that seemed to explode with tiny arachnids and I mean explode. Granted, the fire department was just a block away and I was a self-centered college student that believed the fire department was there for my safety. Yes they came, walking up the street no doubt laughing all the way. Fast forward a few decades and I’m still terrified of these creepy garden intruders. Until this week. Working in my geranium patch I focus in on what I find to be the biggest spider I’ve ever seen (leaving Australia out of the conversation because spiders there are shockingly huge). I quickly snap a picture and ask for help online. Is it a friend or foe???? Responses were popping in, all in favor of this spider, calling her Charlotte as in Charlottes Web. As people chimed in talking about her virtues I became in awe of her beauty and the intricate webs she spun every other day. She became more fat and obviously happy in her rose scented home and I worked around her, saying good morning, marveling at the catch she accumulated and no longer viewing her as an intruder. Then she was gone and I was crushed, I thought she may have met her end by way of a bird because she was huge, fat and easily seen by anything looking for a tasty snack. It made me a true believer of the saying “face your fears” as those fears seem less fearsome when we actually acknowledge and welcome them. She appeared again to my pleasant surprise, maybe she had a long nap, a food comma or needed a house renovation. I will continue to work around her gently, keeping my long gloves nearby in case she has friends or relatives but happy she chose to live in among my geranium.